All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
