Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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