and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
