I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
