i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
