I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
