I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
