this beer tastes like vomit already
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize