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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
