The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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