Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize
