Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
