just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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