My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
