is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
