does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
