i wish peter jackson would direct porn
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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