can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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