all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
