i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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