Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I am midnight drunk by noon
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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