office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
