dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
