I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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