Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Randomize
