the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
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