Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
