plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
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