So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize