If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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