4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
