i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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