Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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