from now on my penis is your penis
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
