What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
