That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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