Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
