i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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