whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
