On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize