thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
