16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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