This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
