I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
