It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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