I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
