Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
