i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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