Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
