yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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